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This is how you should deal with your in laws for successful marriage


Date Posted: 6/30/2017 4:59:33 AM

Posted By: Abced  Membership Level: Gold  Total Points: 1085

Marriage is the union between two people of the opposite sex.Apart from bringing two people who love each other together,marriage also joins families as well.The part of the family,the in-laws,are an important part of your spouse's life.Marriage makes these in-laws important people to you too.In most cases,it is usually difficult adjusting to a new set of people,actually strangers,who have their own set of needs and requirements.Any relationship is bound to occasional arguments and resentments.At times it may seem too difficult too handle your in-laws. As long as you may want to be in their good books,you also will want to stand up for yourself.In such a situation,it will be necessary for you to put extra effort and build a bridge between you and them,so that you may maintain family harmony and peace.

The following tips will be necessary for you to practice to maintain that harmony and peace with your in-laws:

i)Start with your spouse first.
Make sure you work through any existing conflict with your spouse.This is the first and most important step towards effectively dealing with your in-laws. You don't have to involve in-laws in such conflicts existing between the two of you.Obviously,the in-laws will tend to side their daughter or son,incase they become involved in such conflicts that would have solved by the two of you perfectly.So,a good impression is created whenever any conflict with your spouse is handled without involvement of your in-laws.It is easy to handle issues if you as a couple are enjoying your marriage.Understand the bond your spouse shares with his parents and siblings,and encourage them to retain it.Remember that,your partner values his/her parents just as much as you value yours.

ii)Have a direct communication with your in-laws.
Avoiding talking to your in-laws through third party.If you are facing difficulties in the relationship or feel that your in-laws

are being unfair to you,speak to them directly.Any complicated matter will be resolved whenever you try to explain the problem frankly.Making your in-laws know your openness will serve you and your family best.

iii)Employ a sense of humour .
No matter how tough the situation may seem,just try to laugh off any rude comments and insults as far as possible,though it may not be easy.Just try your best since nurturing a good sense of humour can make dealing with your in-laws a lot easier.Try as much as possible to be in control of your emotions.Never let the in-laws upset you and never let your temper flare,as it may worsen a tense situation.Make your in-laws learn that you are not easy to manipulate,by simply choosing to smile at any hurtful comments they may pose at you.Avoid letting them receive the response they hope to receive from your.By doing so,you will prevent them from making further comments.

iv)Build and maintain that respect.
Approach your in-laws the same way you would approach any potential friend .Even if they may seem not in good moods with you,just maintain the necessary respect when approaching them.Don't give them a reason to dislike you.It will be necessary not to use foul language,yell or insult your in-laws. Respect your in-laws,be interested in them and listen to them.The drudge they may have on you will slowly fade away.

v) Stand up for yourself.
As long as you may treat your in-laws with respect and kindness,remember not to adjust your values for them.Make sure to set your priorities and stick to them.You are not under any obligation to become or do what your in-laws want if it does not feel right for you.Remember,people will always respect you back when you respect yourself first.

vi)Stay neutral.
Try to remain as neutral as possible by allowing your husband and children interact with your in-laws freely.Trying to prevent them from doing so will only create acrimony.Staying neutral in a situation where your relationship with your in-laws is not cordial,might help make the relationship amiable.

vii)Remain kind.
Remember,being kind will melt even the hardest of hearts.It actually speaks volumes.Show kindness towards your in-laws at every possible opportunity.Convey the message that you are concerned about their welfare as their own child.Talk and act like you are happy to have them in your life and offer a helping hand whenever the need arises.By behaving in such a manner by displaying kindness,your in-laws will have no reason to dislike you.

viii)Display marturity.
It requires a lot of maturity on your part when dealing with in-laws.You have to accept that things will not always be straight and smooth in a marriage. So,you have to accept anything from your in-laws but be prepared to handle such situations with utmost maturity. Always try putting yourself in your in-laws shoes while dealing with them. Use your instincts and act smartly depending on the situation at hand.

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